Tag Archives: store

The Alec Economy

stockmarketSo I was watching the news yesterday.

Ok. I wasn’t watching the news. I don’t watch the news…who has time for that?

Daddy apparently…cuz he was watching the news. I just heard him talking about it.

He said something about the stock market crashing. Crashing? Into what???

Watch where you’re going????

So I gather a lot of people, lost a lot of money…

Like a ga-zillion dollars…or something? I don’t know how much that is but he made it sound like a lot of quarters. At least 15 or 20.

If that’s true…15 or 20! THAT IS A LOT OF MONEY!!! Whoa.

tick pic1At first I didn’t think anything about it….but then I stopped in my tracks. My Stash!

You can imaging my relief when I ran upstairs and found it was safe and sound.

That got me thinking. Why are people so focused on money?

They should just do what I do. Move to a ticket economy.

See. When I do something at home…or maybe when I’m good at the store…I get tickets.

Like this weekend, for instance. While Mommy and Daddy were painting (mostly Mommy…Dad couldn’t do a paint by number if his life depended on it)…I did a little dusting.

Actually A LOT of dusting. Where does it all come from? Ridiculous!

Anyway. I dusted. Mom gave me tickets.

tick pic3I put my tickets in the little pockets of my bank. And when I want a dwink. I give ’em the tickets…and they take me to get a Coke.

Same thing for movies. When I get enough tickets…Mommy lets me go online and buy a moooo-veeee.

Although I think she moves the line. Some movies only cost 40 tickets…some cost 100…A HUNDRED! Are you freaking serious!?!

She’s all “This one has 3 CDs because it’s the whole season” or “That’s a new one”…

…”so it’s more”. It’s more???

And I’m all “What-evvv.” <insert eye roll here>

Talk about a crash. What kind of shenanigans are going on here??

But it’s cool. I can just go get more tickets.

tick pic2Do you know you can buy a whole roll of them at the store?

Oh yeah…you can.

And they usually have a bunch of ’em too. Red ones. Blue. Green. Pretty much any color.

And you can buy more than one roll at a time. Or at least you should be able to. I’m still working on that.

Daddy says we can’t. Something about rules and rega-lations???

I never know what he’s talking about???? <insert freak-flag here>

Either way. I don’t see what the problem is.

If you want a Coke…or mooo-veee. Just take out the trash. Dust something. Clean your desk. Wash a bowl…

…get a ticket. And relax.

When you run out…just go to the store and get another roll.

Anyway. I gotta go. My Flintstones movie got here yesterday. So I’ll be busy today.

Season 4. The WHOLE season 4! WHAAAAAT!?!?

It’s a great time to be alive.

Bye. See ya ta-mah-wo.

 

Here’s where I got the:

Stock market pic

Hi My Name’s Alec…

toys2…and my parents are addicted to buying me stuffed BAY-bees.

I don’t think you understand. I mean it…you REALLY don’t understand.

It seems everywhere we go…there’s a store with stuff BAY-bees…and we have to stop and get one. Or two…if they’re on sale.

Mommy’s big on sales.

And not just sometimes. ALL. THE. TIME. Cray-cray.

And whenever we go somewhere there is a BAY-bee store. We ALWAYS have to go to THAAAAT store first.

Even before we eat. Unbelievable?

Good news? I have an incredible memory.

So if we’ve been there before. I remember EXACTLY where the BAY-bee store is…so we don’t waste a lot of time looking. We can make a BAY-bee line straight there.

BAY-bee line…get it..bee line..BAY-bee line…haha…I crack me up.

And. Even if we haven’t been there before. I have a pretty good nose for finding the store.

I really am a time saver. You’re welcome Mommy and Daddy.

toys1And now it’s getting worse. They figured out you can buy these things online. So they have book marks on the compuker.

You know…book marks for the sites that sell BAY-bees.

And you should see the shopping carts in some of these stores. I think one cart has about $60,000 worth of BAY-bees!

$60,000! WHO DOES THAT?!?!

So far I’ve held them off on pulling THAT trigger. Sad. <insert cocked to the side, pathetic head shake here>

But if you think that’s bad. Wait!…no Wait!

In order to keep up the charade of this “little” addiction my parents have.

I pick one or two BAY-bees each night to sleep in bed with me.

It’s usually different every night. I don’t want to hurt any feelings.

Mom and Dad think it’s random. But I have a system. You know…to keep everyone happy.

toys3One last thing…and then I have to go.

(This is a tough subject to talk about…if you’ve never lived with an addict…or two…choke…holding back tears)

What I find the most amazing is that I don’t have they haven’t bought me any duplicates.They really are pretty sharp…those two.

Sometimes JackJoey gets a hold of one and…well…let’s just say…it ain’t pretty.

One time. We came home and it was a stuff-pocalypse.

When that happens. They insist on going out and getting a replacement immediately.

Well that’s enough for today.

Thank-you-you’re-welcome.

See ya ta-mah-wo.